233.英文正文（233）

inanothermomenthewouldhearthetrampofbootsoutside。***theycouldnotletsuchanoutburstgounpunished。theywouldknownow，iftheyhadnotknownbefore，thathewasbreakingtheagreementhehadmadewiththem。heobeyedtheparty，buthestillhatedtheparty。intheolddayshehadhiddenahereticalmindbeneathanappearanceofconformity。nowhehadretreatedastepfurther：inthemindhehadsurrendered，buthehadhopedtokeeptheinnerheartinviolate。heknewthathewasinthewrong，buthepreferredtobeinthewrong。theywouldunderstandthat-o』brienwouldunderstandit。itwasallconfessedinthatsinglefoolishcry。hewouldhavetostartalloveragain。itmighttakeyears。heranahandoverhisface，tryingtofamiliarizehimselfwiththenewshape。thereweredeepfurrowsinthecheeks，thecheekbonesfeltsharp，thenoseflattened。besides，sincelastseeinghimselfintheglasshehadbeengivenacompletenewsetofteeth。itwasnoteasytopreserveinscrutabilitywhenyoudidnotknowwhatyourfacelookedlike。inanycase，merecontrolofthefeatureswasnotenough。forthefirsttimeheperceivedthatifyouwanttokeepasecretyoumustalsohideitfromyourself。youmustknowallthewhilethatitisthere，butuntilitisneededyoumustneverletitemergeintoyourconsciousnessinanyshapethatcouldbegivenaname。fromnowonwardshemustnotonlythinkright；hemustfeelright，dreamright。andallthewhilehemustkeephishatredlockedupinsidehimlikeaballofmatterwhichwaspartofhimselfandyetunconnectedwiththerestofhim，akindofcyst。